Dream

My dream this morning: Erica goes into labor. I am supposed to be working in the ER within the next few hours, so we head to the hospital. I go to the ER, where her program director is waiting for me. He acts like he doesn't know who I am, who Erica is, and why I need time off to go be with her. He's laughing and I can tell he's doing it just to be mean. So I tell him I'm leaving and he can't stop me. And that's what happens. So I get back upstairs, reunited with Erica, where the fetal heart rate monitor AND the uterine monitor look like EKG strips. This is ridiculous. If that weren't enough, they start going into V-tach and all these OB residents are running around trying to push drugs in E's IV. I cause a major scene and tell them that no uterus could ever be in V-tach. I was to my boiling point with frustration, E was getting woozy, and I wouldn't let them touch her. Then I woke up.

Why in the world would I have some stressful dream? I would love to just enjoy a dream for once. But my theory has always been: dreams, at least for me, are just a subconscious opportunity to purge all the fears, doubts, stresses, and (frankly) perversions that I'm not even aware of having. My dreams are so primal. I know that's what mine are about - because I always feel so cleansed and refreshed after a worry dream. We've been so excited about having a baby someday, and I guess there are always some fears and worries when you go on any adventure like that.

Anyway.... I just mowed my yard in 100-degree heat. Actually I did the front yard last night after dinner and the back today. I am drenched. My yard is like a dried up dust field. Then I took the recycling and got gas. At the gas station, I got a Gatorade, M&M's, and Chewy Sprees. Awesome. I just consumed about 70 grams of carbs, and I enjoyed EVERY SINGLE ONE of them.

We had Satellite for breakfast with Alex and Landon. We always go there with them. It was really good, too. But not as good as my candy. Ran into the whole Joheim clan there, and we had just been over to their house last night! What a treat.

Erica only has 2 more nights in the ER. I only have one more intern call. HOORAY for that. I am so tired of sitting up there at St. Vincent watching TV and pronouncing dead people. What a trashy way to live. I am bitter.

You know what, though? I am the luckiest, most blessed person in the world. My life makes me happy every day. Wow. And, really, I've never NOT felt that way.